The British Rollercoaster

Up and down up and down up and down. This is my life at the moment. One day I go to bed a nervous exhausted wreck and the next day I feel like I might be getting a handle on this place. Then it starts all over again. Britain is a much different place than Canada. I really can't believe it. I'll adjust soon I'm sure but I'm constantly thrown and made uncomfortable by the differences in day to day living.

There seems to be, and I could be totally wrong here, a real tendency to be much more upfront and direct than is typical in Canada. This might actually just be a difference in the way things are said or whatever, or maybe it's just that I'm unsure or shy about interacting with people so I get overwhelmed. Not sure. Maybe I'm just a little overwhelmed by it all so I end up not talking as much. Here's are some British idioms and some vocabulary that when I first heard I had no idea what the meant.

Taking the piss: messing around. So I think anyway. I found a definition:
Taking the piss - One of the things Americans find hardest about the Brits is our sense of humour. It is obviously different and is mainly based on irony, sarcasm and an in-built desire to "take the piss". This has nothing to do with urine, but simply means making fun of someone.

Trying It On: Used when someone is testing you or trying to push boundaries. "That kid was trying it on in there so I had to set him straight."

Fag: Cigarrette. I knew this but it is actually used quite regularly here.

Stropped off: Used when some one gets angry and loses it or gets very upset. Throwing a tantrum basically.

To Wind Someone Up: To aggravate someone. Very common. As in "If that guy doesn't stop winding me up I'll hit him with this ironing board."

To Bang someone: Hit them, beat them up. Definitely not what it means in Canada. As in "If you hit me with that ironing board again I'll bang you."

Getting on my tits: That's agravating me or: "That's really getting on my tits." I find this hillarious.

Effin and Blindin: Swearing. As in: "Did you hear that guy out side effin and blinding into his mobile phone?"

Bollocks - This is a great English word with many excellent uses. Technically speaking it means testicles but is typically used to describe something that is no good (that's bollocks) or that someone is talking rubbish (he's talking bollocks). Surprisingly it is also used in a positive manner to describe something that is the best, in which case you would describe it as being "the dog's bollocks".

To Pull: To pick up women or men. So when someone says "I pulled last night" it does NOT mean what it means in Canada.

Fanny - Really bad word for vagina. One doesn't normally talk about anyone's fanny as it is a bit rude. You certainly don't have a fanny pack, or smack people on their fannys - you would get arrested for that! Careful use of this word in the UK is advised!

Hash - That's the pound sign on the phone.

Snog - If you're ON THE PULL (I'd say cruising) you'll know you're doing well if you're snogging. Making out heavily.

That's all I can think of for now but let's put all these in context shall we?

So I was out on the pull last week when this girl thought I was taking the piss out of her when I complimented her on her fanny pack. She stropped off but not before she told me that her boyfriend would bang me if I kept trying it on. I tried to say sorry but she was really winding me up with all her effin and blinding and I couldn't understand why she'd stropped off. I said "Bollocks to this" and lit up a fag whilst wondering what went wrong. I wasn't even looking to snog I was just making conversation. She'd stormed off after saying I was getting on her tits but to be quite frank I think she was getting on mine. This isn't really related but when I got home I tried calling telephone banking and when I did they asked me to enter my bank card number and then press the hash key but I didn't know what that meant so I went to bed.

Ta Da!

Some Brit will probably come along and tell me I got everything wrong but hey, I'm still a rookie here.