Sunday, March 25, 2007

Debden Diary

Well I'm through most of the term. This up coming week is all activities which will be tiring and frantic but at least I don't have to plan anything or do much after school.

Interesting thing happened on Tuesday. It all began a few weeks back when my Principal and I had a bet at golf. Our school goes out on some sort of outing every Friday and I made the foolish mistake of betting the loser would have to do "the worm" in assembly at the end of the day. Well, he got 60 points on the driving range and I got well...um...6. So I did a little mock break dance followed by the worm.

The next time we went out it the activity had changed to skating. He actually started the betting process despite the fact that he can't skate. He's a good sport. I won a race so I made him wear his clothes on backwards during assembly and then the week after that I made him wear a dress. Going in last week I figured I'd have to figure out a way to lose to even things out but I was a little apprehensive as to what I'd have to do. The principal rigged it so some kid came in and interfered with me during the race and the forfeit was mine. The kids decided I had to dress up like a gangsta and do a rap in the next assembly.

This turned out to be Tuesday. I hid out until I was announced and walked in the room with full hip hop attire. I hit play on the sound system and launched into the second half of "Parents Just Don't Understand" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince.

I was shitting my pants as I started but then people really got into it. Staff and students were looking somewhat bewildered and amazed 'cause I'm a low key quiet guy at school. I had yet to launch my performing arts skills at their maximum power. Anyway, it went over well and now the kids won't leave me alone to do it again. I rapped the damn song over and over on two more bus trips but they can't seem to get enough. I'll be doing a repeat performance at the term end assembly. I'm trying to think of how to jazz it up a little bit...maybe more bling...maybe a little dance...maybe I'll blend "Bust a Move" in there somehow.

I'll keep you posted

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

But you wouldn't want to live there

I would say I have more experience and knowledge of England and it's culture than some north Americans.
My dad was born in London, all of my mother's family come from England, and I've watched more episodes of Are You being Served? and Jeeves and Wooster than your average country vicar.

However: none of my previous field research into the goodness of Marks and Spencer's prepared foods and the delights of Rybena and dry sherry has prepared me for the sheer assault on the senses that is: life in Debden.

It's a yob night-mare. It's a tiny, ugly, battered concrete high-street, which someone optimistically (presumably while drunk) named the Broadway. A testament to all that is wrong with post-war building, it contains shops so depressed and shabby that you get the feeling the owners would be all too grateful if you shoplifted them into an early retirement. When I moved in, my aunt from Chislehurst said that it was like a time capsule to the high-streets of remembered from her youth in the sixties and seventies. There are two betting shops, three hair-dressers and (here's the kicker) two discount carpet shops. Now I know we all love a good piece of discount carpet, but come on. Two shops?? Are you seriously asking me to believe that the crushing demand for cheap rugs has swollen to the point that one such establishment can no longer keep up?

Then there's the population of Debden: old people and youwf. The eldery are lovely - my only issue with them is that they are always in front of me at Sainsbury's, buying twenty packets of cream crackers, rooting around for the correct change, and having prolonged discussions about the council's decision to relocate the bus stop twenty yards down the road.

The youwf (i.e. local pronounciation of "youth") are all ten to twelve years old, wear baggy track pants, hang around the local gas station (or 'garage'), bum smokes and beer off of anyone they can, litter, spit, shriek, rev the engines of their cars, beat each other up, shoplift, and generally get underfoot when you're fighting your way towards a pint of milk at ten o'clock at night.

And the frustrating thing is that Debden actually has the potential to be a charming little village. It is surrounded by some of the greenest, loveliest, most breathtaking countryside you could hope for. The local Epping Forest is renown as a place of calm and beauty and tranquility (as well as being a convinient place to dispose of corpses, but never mind.) When the sun comes out, there's not a more picturesque place to behold. Too bad you have to squint past the clouds of underage smoke and people fighting over the latest carpet sale to see it.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Dispatches from the front

I'm officially in training for the title of Worst and Most Infrequent Blogger Ever.
To me, blogging is like communism: I love the idea in theory, but it ain't working so well for me in practise.
Also: I am frantic right now. It's March! End of term approacheth! Busy, busy, busy bees are we! Here's a run-down on what's keeping me busy right now:

a) training for a Stage Combat Exam (involving rapier and bare-knuckle fighting...don't worry, no serious injuries to report yet....knock on wood!)
b) big night of duets coming up this Wednesday...I'm singing this song from a musical called "Chess", which was a big deal back in the 80's and is written by one of the guys from ABBA. (Truly, there is no end to their talents. Truly.) My partner is a lovely Welsh boy called Dan, who turns into a Restoration dandy or "wit picker" when he's had a few drinks, and proceeds to be exceedingly cutting and foppish to the amusement of all assembled.
c) involved in creating a new theatre piece with two other actresses and one of the directors from the directing MA program, which involves weekly meetings where we've so far determined that the main things we have in common are love of wine, avocados, and weekend newspapers. It's a start.
d)heading down to Ravensbourne tv and film school to shoot our specially-commissioned-for-our-class tv scripts. I get to play a morally ambiguous psychiatrist (is she evil? isn't she? how much does she know? is she in on it?) named Dr. Krane...boy the writers really stretched themselves to come up with that name, didn't they? I'm working with a great group of fellow actors, so I feel really lucky and priviledged and hope the shooting next week will be fun. Ravensbourne is in Chislehurst, just round the corner from where my aunt lives, so that will be fun to tromp round my old haunts and possibly pop in to eat my family's cupboards bare along the way.
e) private coachings thrice-weekly for the Carleton Hobbs auditions in 2 weeks. Not sure who knows about this and who doesn't, so, in a nut-shell: auditions at the BBC for the chance to win a 6 month paid radio contract with them. Highly coveted and desirable prize. Difficult to even get selected to audition. Fabulous opportunity. That's March 19th, so cross your fingers for me please. I'm up against approximately 80 others, competing for potentially 8 places. One in 10 odds? Child's play. I spend my professional life gambling on such odds. I'll win it if I can.

So sorry if I don't blog much. It doesn't mean I don't care. It just means I'm deaf, dumb, and mad from exhaustion. But it's a full life. I'm very lucky.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Friday Night is MY NIGHT!

The end of another week. There's no better time than Friday night. I hit the end of the day and no fucking way am I doing any work, worrying about it, thinking about it, or picking up a pen or paper for any purpose other than to write down a take out food order or a phone number to call for pizza, or a grocery list for dinner. From 5:00pm on is my only stress free time of the week. I suck it in like a drowning man coming up for air. Eat it up like a starving man at a buffet. Live it like it's my last day on earth. It's feel good time baby!

Another two weeks since I last blogged. I'd like to blog more but I've gone through this phase where I'm slacking off because it seems like more work and I'm pretty over worked. Teaching is stressful. Especially where I am. Have I mentioned this before?

I had a science specialist who I've been working with come into class today and I think he was pretty shocked at the kids behaviour. Every one tells me I should relax and not worry about my teaching but I know there are things I should be doing...like evaluating, having the proper work ready, having extra work ready for kids, focusing on their tests, organizing so I can get experiments done for them... all of which I'm struggling with mightily. One day I'll look back and I'll laugh and laugh and laugh at all this but it's the tough at the moment.

Having said that I seem to have the undying support of the administration and many of my colleagues which is what really keeps me going. Apparently I care about the kids and this is important. Good to know. Just wish I could teach properly. But there you have it. The caring of the kids is important. It's amazing how much work I can put into a 45 minute lesson. Like an hour minimum. Maybe an hour and a half. People keep telling me to stop doing this but I'm not quite sure how. I can't seem to stop planning and replanning or quite figure out a simple logical sequence for a lesson.

But it's Friday! Enough of that!

Babagenouche and I are going to central London tomorrow to check out a show called I like Mine with a Kiss which is getting absolutely fantastic reviews. That should be fun. Incidentally has anyone heard about Daniel Radcliffe playing in Equus? Daniel Radcliffe is better known as Hary Potter and Equus is better known as "full frontal nudity play about an insane psychologically damaged young man who blinds horses." It's getting absolutely amazing reviews! Radcliffe is apparently amazing. Who knew Harry Potter would go so far?

Babagenouche and I are also planning on going to Valencia Spain over our Easter Break in 4 weeks. Should be awesome sunning and relaxing time.

Good things on the agenda in the near future! Hooray!